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Doubt


Always second doubting myself







I am officially in the point of my life where I have totally clueless about the future. 

Never have I felt this in the supposedly rebellious teenage years nor have I felt this as a fresh graduate. 

But now, when I have a great job, great family and friends, the almost perfect life where there is nothing for me to worry about at all, I am lost. When people ask me where do I see myself in 5 years time. I honestly cannot answer. It was easy if that question has been asked when I am 17. It will be I can see myself going to university studying what I want to study. But life has been less straightforward nowadays. 

I realise I overthink, a lot. I become so conscious and cautious where I will rethink all my decisions/options 3 times and may not even reach any conclusion. For example, I will plan my trip to the gym at least 3 times in my head, considering which gym to go to, what time I should go, or should not go, etc etc. 

The truth is, it is more tiring than ever. 

I want to find back the daring, bold and agile old self. Where did she go?


Well, seems like my top is brighter than my future.